If you find yourself on a merry go round of self-sacrifice, which leads to resentment, which leads to martyr (aka look how hard it is for me) which leads to a empty well... I have something for you.
It is your job to be in deep service to radical self love. When you are in sacred service to yourself then you can be in SERVICE to the world around you. Not servitude. SERVICE.
From a full tank. Not an empty, dry well of resentment.
I have this vision of the woman who resentfully cleans the house hoping to be appreciated. Or the woman who always gives first in s*x hoping to GET the pleasure she hopes for.
You cannot will a different reality without taking conscious action and establishing boundaries. There is nothing to “GET”.
If you are accepting scraps of attention, love, care and support from the people around you, the chances are you have trained them to treat you that way.
What we accept communicates what we believe we are worthy of. No one can define that for us.
The good news is this — IT IS YOUR JOB TO HONOR YOURSELF AS DEEPLY AS POSSIBLE.
It is your job to find your YES, and communicate your NO.
When you are a NO to self-abandon, you can follow your YES to a new type of freedom. Choosing you. Choosing desire. Pleasure. Your delicious s*x. Your body.
Commitment is a choice — you do not have to wait to be chosen.
You know the feeling of desperately trying to figure out whether the person you’re dating wants to truly commit to you? You know all the tricks and hints you’ve used to try and figure out how much you mean to them? 🤯
Oh babe, I got you. I know. I have done most of those hooks and it never got me close to what I wanted.
There is an unfortunate phenomenon that women in particular are taught — you have to wait to be chosen. This sends you crazy because you think you don’t have any power or choice in you present reality.
You obsess, pick fights, go cold and withhold your love, compare yourself to other women, provoke him and analyse his reaction. “If he really cared about me he would tell me he loved me, or stopped being friends with other women, or tell me I am the one.” Am I right sisters? 🤭
Energetically this feels like shit for both you and him.
The truth is that you are probably waiting for him to do something before YOU commit.
What if commitment was a choice? A daily choice. What if “the one” was the “one right now” always and commitment wasn’t measured in a status symbol or “I want you to be mine forever”? After transforming my relationship to men I have a particular flavour of mastery that I like to share with other women.
I support you to drop the crazy obsession and story that you’re not enough. I mentor you through unleashing your true desire in any moment, giving you the power of CHOICE in your relationships to men.
I have seen again and again how a woman who truly backs her own choice is irresistible to men.
Are you ready to work on this? Book in for a Desire Consultations to see my new coaching offerings for women.